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Change is inevitable. Yarn helps

Writer's picture: Rebecca (a yarn enthusiast)Rebecca (a yarn enthusiast)

Updated: Nov 15, 2024

yarn, shawl, crochet, New Orleans, Local Yarn Shop, Prym
Yarn from The Quarter Stitch (French Quarter, NOLA USA)

The past year has marked a significant SHIFT in my life. It wasn't the birth or death of anyone close, but it was the end of an era, so to speak.

Last year in June, my oldest grandchild got his driver's license, and suddenly, I was freed from being on call as my daughter's backup for rides to music lessons, band rehearsals, school events and more.


In one way, it was freeing, as I was now able to schedule things during the week and on weekends without wondering if the Grammy Taxi would be needed. I had been in Mom/Grandma mode non-stop for more than 30 years, as he was born the same month that my youngest child (son) graduated from high school. Suffice it to say that the concept of not having these responsibilities on a regular basis was both exciting and sobering.

The sobering aspect was that this change represented a significant pivot in my interactions with my grandchildren. Over the years, the rides and drop offs afforded me hours upon hours (cumulatively) of time with them. As the oldest of my daughter's children, my grandson became involved in school and community things first, so I ended up shuttling him to things for more years than the others. In those rides, we talked about life: his dreams, his plans, his struggles, and more. I looked forward to those times and enjoyed knowing who he was becoming as a young adult.


Those regular interactions also meant that he often reached out to me for help with school work when Mom was busy, for my opinion on things he was interested in, to tattle tale on his sister, or to share something NEW that came up and was exciting for him. I knew that I was blessed to have a close relationship with my grandchildren, and in my logical brain, I also knew it was time for him, as the oldest, to move on into the more independent phase of his young adult life.

That didn't mean it was easy. It was akin to experiencing the "empty nest" when my own children left home, all over again, and it was hard. Still, I knew it was a normal life change, and one that was important for his growth and development as a young adult.

Understanding that my role as a mother/grandmother is to help nurture children to become independent, healthy and strong young adults who can then move on to their own adult versions of themselves, I embraced this transition; but I also realized that I needed to pay attention to my own feelings of loss and change. Thankfully, I had a LOT of fiber projects in the queue that would be helpful to me as I walked this NEW way of being week to week.

The solace that comes when we are crocheting, knitting or sewing helps us navigate difficult change. Its meditation-like rhythms are soothing to our minds, and the interaction with soft yarns or fabric in pleasing colors helps to boost supportive neurochemicals in our brains. According to research into the impact of color, "...[a c]omplete absence of color has been shown to detrimentally affect psychological and physiological function in humans." (link)

Research shared on Psychology Today's website notes that "Color is an important stimulus for the brain because 80 percent of our sensory impressions come from our visual system."

Colors can do more than we think. They can affect not only your mood but also your energy level, sleep pattern, blood pressure, and even sexuality. (Elliot, A. J, 2015; Elliot, A. J., and Niesta, D. 2008).

Similar to our response to color, our brains react to textures (link). Research has shown that when we touch various surface types, we experience differing emotions. It was found that "...soft surfaces are generally associated with pleasant emotions, while rough surfaces - with unpleasant feelings." This isn't absolute, but for the purpose of this blog post, I believe we can agree that SOFT yarn is preferable to SCRATCHY yarn. If anyone wants backup on that, head on over to Facebook or Instagram as there are ample posts on this yarn or that one being "scratchy" which always correlates (in those posts) with "bad".

As I pulled together my outline for this blog post, I began to recall different times when creative activities helped me navigate rough patches in life. This contemplation helped me to realize that my grandmother, a prolific crocheter who taught me to crochet a chain when I was 10 years old, was likely ALSO finding great solace in yarn and hook.

She did not teach me to crochet and then tell me that life was going to kick my butt and that I would need this therapeutic option. She didn't ever complain, or acknowledge that she crocheted to help manage life's many detours. In her wisdom, though, she quietly and stoically modeled how to stay grounded when life hands you challenges, including her own cancer journey and the early death of her husband (my grandfather).

Creativity can be challenging in difficult times. I have found that it's helpful to have a "First Aid" plan at the ready. Here's a short list of steps/actions we can take when we need some comfort, and have crocheting, knitting or sewing skills.

Fiber First Aid

  1. Organize any projects-in-progress

    1. Identify one to pick back up and work to completion.

  2. Clean out, organize and freshen the yarn or fabric stash.

    1. Decide to donate some yarn or fabric before buying new

    2. Reap the benefits of "discovering" fabric or yarn we haven't seen in a while

  3. Find a NEW project that is a small undertaking

    1. Pinterest has a lot of ideas, as does the internet (Google)

    2. "Shop" in our stash to make the first version of the new pattern

    3. Keep the finished object in a prominent place

      1. it helps remind us of our strength and resilience

  4. Learn a new technique

  5. Make something small to gift to someone, "just because".

    1. I have found that surprise small gifts - given for no particular reason - are the most joyously received gifts of all!

  6. Make something for ourselves!

  7. Find a local (or online) crochet/knitting/sewing group to join

    1. Commit to participating on a regular basis.

  8. Visit the local library and check out books on our fiber craft of choice.

    1. This is one of the BEST ways to freshen our thinking about fiber arts and it costs nothing but our time!

  9. Chart a personal journey of discovery

    1. Get a crochet or knitting page-a-day calendar and make a swatch for each stitch presented.

    2. Most of us won't get 365 of them done, but this is more about the journey than the destination.

fabric, sewing, Easter Egg, crafts, fiber art
Fabric Easter Egg "envelope"

I am forever grateful to have skills in crocheting, knitting and sewing. It is not only a thread that connects me to my family, past and present (my sister sews - much better than I do!), it is therapeutic in ways that are increasingly being acknowledged in the medical and psychology corners of healthcare.

And,... as far as I can tell, the only DOWNSIDES are the tendency for our stashes to grow unchecked, and the temptation to crochet/knit/sew when we might need to vacuum, fold laundry or do the dishes.

(guilty as charged,... and unrepentant)

That which we do in the creative corners of our lives is sacred work. Taking care of ourselves is job one, especially as we get older. No one is coming by to say "You seem sad - how can I make if all better?" We're basically on our own to address the ups and downs in life. The good news, however, is that we have SKILLS, and OPTIONS, and a lot of company in finding solace through our craft.

Change is indeed inevitable. It's also important for growth and to avoid stagnation, but this doesn't mean it's easy. Thankfully, there's an abundant supply of YARN and FABRIC to help us make it through.

 

(C) 2024 Stitch 'n Dish






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