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Good deeds in yarn

Writer's picture: Rebecca (a yarn enthusiast)Rebecca (a yarn enthusiast)

Updated: Jun 3, 2023

Most of us that crochet or knit probably don't think a lot about how our yarn habit might help us out of a jam. This blog post highlights how being generous with our time and talent can pay dividends, and maybe even protect us from potentially negative circumstances!

A couple years ago, a colleague of mine in a different department, shared that he and his wife were having a baby. I was thrilled for them, and wanted to make something special for their new little one.


When I finished the "Call the Midwife" blanket - butterfly version (pictured above), I wrapped it up in a gift bag and took it to work. He and his wife LOVED the blanket and I received a heartfelt note from them thanking me for it. He and I share a history in that we both served in the US Navy and were both Hospital Corps personnel: he saw combat in the Afghanistan War and I served in relative peace time during the Cold War, so our service is separated by a couple decades. Still, we have a shared early adulthood experience which among Veterans, creates a strong bond.


Fast forward a couple years and an issue arose where there was a question about a financial matter. It was one of those things where someone else did something, unbeknownst to me but that impacted me. It was going to result in a possible bill of several thousand dollars - again, for something that I didn't know about or have a hand in.


I have gotten better about not overreacting to things so I didn't blow up, but settled in to work the process of appeal that is in place for situations like this (these are not uncommon, btw). Still, I knew there was a possibility that I would have to take the financial hit - and that didn't make me very happy.


My contact on the matter assured me that I had a strong case for appeal but that there were no guarantees. I'm old enough to know that in life there are NEVER any guarantees, so I resigned myself that whatever will be, will be; and I let it go.


The next morning when I went into work, my contact called me and said: "Great news! I just talked to 'Fred' and you're good to go. No debt and this is cleared up!"


As anyone would be, I was ELATED and GRATEFUL! I asked what had transpired to make this happen so quickly as I had understood the appeal process - which I had not even started - may take up to 6 months.


My contact told me that when "Fred" reviewed the incident in question, he saw where the original action had been taken (no issues) but also saw how the auditors flagged it. His words: "This could be interpreted either way,..."


Knowing "Fred" as I do, his decision on this would likely be the same for any person in this same circumstance. Still, I can't help but think that my gift of love for his little one a couple years ago played a part in him deciding that this was not going to be pursued any further.


Yes, people in positions where decisions can be made one way or another have ethical obligations to choose based on the facts, but we are ALL human. As humans, we respond to kindness - especially kindness that is extended for no other reason than to be kind.


In contrast, and interestingly in the same week a former employee (different person), who had behaved very badly when he worked for me, got unwelcome press that he is being charged with some serious crimes. He was a TERRIBLE employee, and I had put this person on a personnel action to address his performance. He responded by finding a new position in the same organization and leaving before the action could even get started.


It's important to pause here and note that I had given this person multiple 2nd chance opportunities when he made mistakes on the job and behaved in ways that were inappropriate at work. In other words, I was very lenient with him (some would say, TOO lenient).


This person's "thank you" to me for more than 2 years of leniency and breaks was to go around to all my employees and "sh!t talk" me to them. The only reason I know this is that I have a good relationship with my team, and people were embarrassed at his behavior as well as somewhat protective of me, so several of them reported this behavior to me.


Fast forward to the announcement that this guy is facing prison time, and I got a message that he was looking for people to come make a statement of support for his character to the court. People with nice job titles and positions are always preferred over regular folks, I guess, so I'm not surprised at the ask - but it sure took a lot of nerve!


I did not respond (and will not). The really sad thing here is that had he stopped short of the bad-mouthing, and just been an awful employee; I'd probably have agreed to be a character witness for him. But he crossed the line when he "paid me back" for being supportive and lenient and understanding by besmirching my name to my team (his bad-mouthing made him look worse than it did me, and had no negative impact on me with my team).


I will not be providing character witness testimony for him, but he'll probably find someone else who will. Still, he is likely to serve prison time and while he was a first-class jerk when he worked for me, I do not wish him any ill. I do think he needs to learn some hard life lessons, and hopefully this will help make that happen.


These 2 very different examples have less to do with yarn than life, but I look at yarn as an integral part of life. If nothing else, the items we create with yarn are physical manifestations of our positive intentions, well wishes and good will toward others. When we give of ourselves with a hand-knitted or crocheted piece that we make specially for someone, we are communicating that we care and wish them good things in life.


Hallmark Cards had a tagline (originated in 1944) for years that said: "When you care enough to send the very best!" I think that we communicate that we care a lot when we take the time and care to create something of beauty out of yarn and give it to someone.


So keep those knitting needles and crochet hooks working. You never know when your kindness of a special gift will bounce back as a blessing.


 

(C) 2023 Stitch 'n Dish



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